Historians often speak of spending hours in archives reading old letters filed away in boxes. As a contextual theologian, my research has focused on interviewing and observing people in the present moment, reading theology, and reading works on the context by social scientists. Yet in contrast to research for all my other books, during my sabbatical in the spring of 2023 I found myself reading through old letters filed away in boxes. The two boxes came from my parents’ garage. They were my letters. Thankfully, my father, like an archivist, had kept all the letters I had written to them during my college years and the years I lived in Honduras. I read the letters because I am working on a memoir. I will leave describing the memoir for another day (actually, it will likely be a few years). The letters provided material on themes I am exploring in the memoir, but reading them did much more than that. At times I cringed as I read statements I made in my 20’s. Other times I read with pride. Often, I felt compassion for that younger Mark Baker and, just as often, I would find myself smiling at similarities with the present--Mark Baker being Mark Baker. At times the twentysomething Mark would speak through those letters challenging my current self. From the many reflections I had reading the letters, in this blog I will share two.
Revise rather than total rejection
Living in Honduras stirred up and transformed my life in many ways. I read the letters with wonder and gratitude as I saw the many ways God used experiences to shape and mold me. In general I affirm the changes I made. Yet as I read the letters I often wondered if I abandoned more than I needed to when I left position for another. In retrospect, I can see that often revision would have been better than total rejection. I will give just one example. During my first four years in Honduras I became increasingly critical of a gospel focused only on individual spiritual future salvation. Later, some reading and experiences led me to think critically not only of the content but also methods of evangelism. Like many in my circles, I stopped doing evangelism. Thankfully, in this case, the rejection did not last long. I began working with InterVarsity Christian Fellowship at Syracuse University. The job description included doing evangelism. That forced me to not just critique the way some other groups did evangelism on campus, but to work at developing evangelistic methods I did feel comfortable with. Working with IVCF led me to revise how I did evangelism rather abandon it. Unfortunately, in some other areas in my life I did not have an outside influence that pushed me to evaluate whether, even if correct in my critiques, I had rejected more than I needed to. I encourage you, and myself, to revise rather than totally reject. (As I wrote that sentence, I immediately felt the need to add a caveat. A voice within me said, “But Mark there have been some things you stepped away from totally, and appropriately so.” True, so, let’s not say to always revise rather than reject, but perhaps revision would be a better default starting point. And only after further discernment, perhaps rejection.)
I have changed, others might change too
Reading the letters reminded me of many ways I changed in those years. To list a few:
- I started college with a desire to get rich. Four years later I sought to live on as little as possible and give what remained of my salary to the poor.
- I arrived in Honduras a dispensationalist and changed significantly in just a few years. The changes from my dispensationalism included: a shift from a personal-spiritual-future gospel to a more holistic gospel, a shift from the Kingdom of God being a minor theme in my theology and Christian living to it being a major theme, and a shift from a negative view of Pentecostals to being open to the gifts of the Spirit and going to a Pentecostal church.
- In college I wrote a paper affirming the just war approach (not with much conviction, but also without any doubts). A few years later, after actually being in a war zone in El Salvador, hearing stories of massacres from survivors, and reading Jacques Ellul I embraced Christian pacifism.
I could list other changes, but these few are enough to make the point that I changed in significant ways. This served as a needed reminder and challenge; if I changed others can as well. Even though I have recognized this before, I still have a tendency to categorize some people based on a piece of information. For instance, at times I make assumptions about people’s theology based on what seminary or university they attended, what denomination they are in, or, at times, even based on what Bible translation they use. That is problematic itself, most of us are more complex than one of those factors might imply. But what is more problematic is my tendency to assume what they were is what they are, and what they will be. What if I applied this to myself? I would be correct to assume that because Mark Baker went to a dispensationalist church he was dispensationalist when he was 20 years old. But wrong to think that means he is still dispensationalist. Yet, I at times do that with others. I changed, perhaps others have changed too—or perhaps they will.
I had an internal argument with myself as I wrote the previous paragraph—and not just because it is embarrassing to acknowledged this. A voice in my head was saying, “But Mark, that can’t be true. Clearly you do expect people to change. You write books, teach classes, and write blogs with the expectation that they will influence people and that people will change.” True, and I think the openness and hope I have that people will change is more prominent in my life. Yet, the reality is that vestiges of my bounded-church past still have a pull on me. In what I described above, they lead me to focus on positional thinking rather than directional thinking. This displays the laziness inherent in a bounded approach. It seizes on a particular item and draws conclusions, rather than digging deeper to discover trajectory and ask what direction the person is heading. May we avoid easy/lazy categorization and let us not give up on people.
An important caveat: change is not automatic or guaranteed. A call to not make assumptions about people because of something in their past, and to not assume people will remain in the same position they are now is not a call to passivity. I changed because of experiences I had, because of questions people asked me, because of books people put in my hands, because of observing others, etc. With an awareness that people can change, let us be open to ways the Spirit may lead us to contribute to others taking transformative steps in a journey toward our center—Jesus Christ.